I remember the first time I uploaded a sketch into Illustrator to trace and color and how nothing felt so right and to be honest, a little teary eyed at the whole process (I know, I know, I'm becoming my mother that my younger self used to giggle at).
Then, for whatever reason, I abandoned it. The dream was mismanaged and completely consuming. I understand that any lofty goal takes a lot of hard work, but I made it central to my identity. I have trouble with an all consuming passion of the things that I love, that I lose sight of reality. I spent this past Fall and Winter, realigning my priorities, thinking I had to abandon the dream completely. But evidently, there is still that small flicker burning inside of me.
I'm ready to begin again. With no solid expectations than for myself to put in a little bit of time every day. I'm currently working in my free time to finish up a quilt that my cousin commissioned me to do for him. It's one of my biggest quilts to date, but I'm hoping to have it finished by the end of the month. I've made the commitment that once I have that done, I'm going to spend an hour a day developing my skills/building a portfolio- watching Skillshare classes, taking inspirational photographs for my sketches, drawing motifs, and then uploading them into illustrator and building patterns. I tried stretching myself too far the last time, but I have a more focused, manageable plan this time around. I know I won't be happy until I at least try-so I pray that this time I can put in a good effort while keeping my life and ideals in balance.
|My favorite focal print that I created last summer during the online workshop :)|